Being Human at Work
When our oldest child entered middle school, we found it necessary to meet with his principal. At that time of course, school was his full-time job — and there were developing signs that it was the wrong job. As parents, we felt the need to discuss a strategy to address the job-person fit. To be frank, the over-riding goal was not to boost his grades, but to protect him as a developing individual.
As things stood, his role was clearly a frustrating exercise. Sadly, he was showing signs of complete exhaustion. One very astute teacher put it this way: “He actually has 7 bosses and they all want something a little different. That’s not an easy task.” I couldn’t have put it better. He was drowning amid the demands he faced. None of this emphasized his strengths — only his clear weaknesses in the executive functioning realm.
Our son brought himself to his role as student. But more importantly, he was a human being that was faced with the learning environment as it was presented. We held no judgements as to what was “right” or “wrong” about that environment — only that his experience with that environment was both unique and challenging.
What we asked of his principal was quite simple: 1.) That he had an opportunity to explore/discover something that brought him feelings of competence and 2.) that he still loved (or at the very least, respected) the process of learning when he left her care. She was the needed glue to help him to sift through the noise and find the signals.
Being human at work poses a related challenge.
When you ponder your work life, what immediately comes to mind? Do you feel supported? Respected? Are you challenged? Are you developing in a manner that is meaningful? Are the unique qualities that define the positive foundation of you, a part of that work life? Or like our son, are you faced with poor job-person fit?
These may sound like unusual questions. But, they shouldn’t be.
When I discuss negative work experiences with clients, expressions of feeling “drained, “lost” or “frustrated” are mentioned. When we are fighting for the elements that uniquely define who we are, we suffer. Our employers may miss out on our strengths. Our customers do not benefit from our talents.
We wage a talent war that no one can win.
This realization drove me to take a step back.
What might help explain why this dynamic — that when ignored can become utterly devastating. I recalled humanistic psychology. A reaction to behaviorism and the tenets of psychoanalytic thought (made known by Freud), humanistic theory offers an interesting framework as we approach the job-person fit. Humanism explains that we possess a drive toward becoming self-actualized. In other words, a drive to maximize our creative potential. (This line of thought came to the forefront through the work of psychologists Carl Rogers and Abraham Maslow.)
Its direction and tenor could easily apply to work life:
- When considering people — the whole is greater than the sum of the parts.
- There is a drive to achieve congruence between our “real self” and the “ideal self”.
- Some measure of unconditional positive regard is necessary to fully develop as an individual.
- An individual is greatly influenced by his/her environment. Social interaction is key to development.
- We are fully aware and can make a conscious choice. Our past experienced help drive future behavior.
- Human beings are uniquely capable of intentional thought and goal directed behaviors.
I wonder how we can build this respect for individuals into every organization. How might current trends in HR support this effort?
I know there are many of us fighting for this. Is one of them you?
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