“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams and endeavors to live the life he imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” – Henry David Thoreau
Do you have dream stealers in your life? You know, those people who think they are doing you a favor by ripping apart your aspirations and sharing their more “realistic” point of view with you? If your dreams are large enough, chances are good that you will make others around you uncomfortable. Many of the people in your life want you to stay at their level – they want you to do well, just not better than them.
There’s a story about putting crabs in a bucket. If you put one crab in the bucket, it will easily climb out. However, if you put two crabs in the bucket, the second one will hold the first one back so it can’t escape. Think about the people you hang out with most, do they encourage or discourage you? Do they hold you back or let you soar? See how blogger Scott Williams shares how he benefits from his mother’s encouragement.
Your goals and desires are yours and yours alone. If you see yourself reaching the pinnacle of your personal and professional pursuits, you can achieve them. How many stories have you heard of people that went against the odds and achieved extraordinary success? How many more people do you know who are stuck in “woulda, coulda, shoulda” land? The “woulda, coulda, shouda’s” will give you every excuse in the book as to why they didn’t make it. Why they HAD to give up. How they just couldn’t continue. They don’t want to admit that they simply gave up.
Sometimes you also have to make difficult choices about the people in your life. If you are not encouraged and supported by others regarding the goals that you are totally passionate about, you may have to leave those people behind. Joe Barton shares helpful “quick and dirty” tips for getting rid of the toxic people in your life. When you are on the path to your destiny, it’s important to associate with people who see you accomplishing your dreams. Your vocation may not be right for everyone, but it’s perfect for you.
Take out a piece of paper and draw two columns. On the top of one column put a (+) and the other column, put a (-). Think of the people that you associate with on a regular basis. Put the names of the people who leave you feeling better about yourself when you are around them on the PLUS side, and those who make you feel worse about yourself on the MINUS side. Which column has more names?
If you find that you need to change your associations, go where others with your same interests hang out. Meetup.com is a terrific place to start. You’ll find kindred spirits – or at least people who know what the heck you’re talking about. You can also join your industry association and go to their meetings. Attend networking events and talk to “friends you haven’t met yet.” Get out of your comfort zone and consciously look for new ways to meet people. You’ll be surprised and pleased with the quality of friendships that develop when you meet people on a similar path.
What is your passion? What spurs you on? What will you do TODAY to move closer to your goal? Take a teeny-tiny baby step today, and then one tomorrow. As you inch closer to your calling, you will meet with fabulous success in unexpected hours.
(About the Author: Employee Engagement Expert and Motivational Speaker, Lisa Ryan works with organizations to help them keep their top talent and best customers from becoming someone else’s. She achieves this through personalized employee engagement and customer retention keynotes, workshops and seminars. She is the author of six books, and is featured in two films including the award-winning, “The Keeper of the Keys” with Jack Canfield of Chicken Soup for the Soul. For more information, please connect with Lisa at her website: www.grategy.com or email her at lisa@grategy.com.)
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